How Childhood Events Create Negative Beliefs That Run Our Lives — And How We Heal Them
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

How Childhood Events Create Negative Beliefs That Run Our Lives — And How We Heal Them

In moments we didn’t feel safe, loved, or seen.

What we experienced in childhood — like parental infidelity, divorce, emotional neglect, bullying, or even subtle criticism — planted deep unconscious beliefs that still shape our relationships, self-worth, and decision-making.

The result? As adults, we silently operate from beliefs like:

  • “I’m not good enough”

  • “Love is unsafe”

  • “I will be abandoned”

  • “I need to be perfect to be accepted”

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Why Change Feels So Hard (and How to Make It Stick for Good)
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Why Change Feels So Hard (and How to Make It Stick for Good)

Why Mindset Work Isn’t Enough

We’ve been sold this idea that if we “just change our thoughts,” our lives will magically shift. And yes—our thoughts do matter. But real, lasting change runs much deeper.

The truth is, your nervous system and your unconscious identity decide what you allow into your life—not just your conscious thoughts.

You can repeat affirmations all day, but if your system doesn’t feel safe having the thing you want—whether it’s money, love, success, or peace—you’ll push it away without even realizing it.

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The Perception Filter: Unlocking Hidden Realities through Belief Transformation
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

The Perception Filter: Unlocking Hidden Realities through Belief Transformation

How Perception Creates (or Blocks) Reality

Your brain is a prediction machine, filtering information based on past experiences, learned beliefs, and internal narratives. This is known as perceptual bias, where you selectively process information that aligns with your pre-existing worldview.

For example, if you hold the belief that "success takes decades of struggle," your mind will ignore or downplay stories of individuals who achieved rapid success. Even if such examples appear in front of you, your subconscious mind will rationalize them as "exceptions" or "lucky cases," reinforcing your old belief. In contrast, if you adopt the belief that "success can happen swiftly under the right conditions," your mind will begin recognizing new pathways, connections, and opportunities that align with that belief.

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Biology Before Psychology: Healing Anxiety and Depression Through Nutrition
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Biology Before Psychology: Healing Anxiety and Depression Through Nutrition

When struggling with anxiety and depression, most people turn to therapy, medication, or mindfulness practices first. But what if we told you that before diving into psychological interventions, it’s essential to clean up your biology? What you eat and drink has a direct impact on your brain chemistry, and the evidence linking diet, inflammation, and mental health is stronger than ever.

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The Unconscious Mind: How the First Seven Years Shape Your Life
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

The Unconscious Mind: How the First Seven Years Shape Your Life

Growing up, my first seven years were shaped by the chaos of living with a drug-addicted, abusive father. His unpredictable behavior, anger, and addiction created a world where I had to be hyper-aware of my surroundings at all times. I learned early on that love could be conditional, that safety was never guaranteed, and that I had to suppress my needs to survive. These experiences didn’t just fade as I got older. They became the unconscious blueprint for how I viewed myself, relationships, and the world.

Without realizing it, I carried these unconscious beliefs into adulthood, making large, painful decisions that were not only isolating for me but also difficult for my family. I had an overwhelming need to run away—from relationships, jobs, and even locations. I changed careers, ended marriages, and moved eight times, always believing that the next place or person would finally bring me peace. But no matter where I went or who I was with, the same feelings of restlessness, unease, and the need to escape followed me.

Then, by the time I was 25 years old, my body broke down. I developed interstitial cystitis, a painful chronic illness that doctors couldn’t find a clear cause for. What I didn’t realize at the time was that my nervous system had been in survival mode for so long that it finally collapsed under the weight of stress. The unconscious patterns I had been living by weren’t just affecting my mind—they were destroying my physical health.

I spent years searching for a cure, going from doctor to doctor, trying every conventional treatment available. But the real breakthrough came when I turned to alternative treatments that addressed not just my physical symptoms but the deep-rooted emotional and psychological trauma that had been stored in my body. The healing journey was not just about my illness—it was about rewiring my unconscious mind and finally breaking free from the stress that had controlled my life for so long.

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Here Is the Reason You Are Still Overweight – Even Though It’s Not Your Fault
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Here Is the Reason You Are Still Overweight – Even Though It’s Not Your Fault

Sarah had been on a diet since she was 14. She had tried every weight loss program out there—calorie counting, keto, intermittent fasting, personal trainers, even medical weight loss programs.

Each time, she would lose weight for a while, only to find herself slipping back into old habits, gaining it all back (and more). It was like her body had an autopilot setting programmed for failure.

"I would be SO motivated," she told me. "I would meal prep, exercise, and do everything right. But the moment I hit a certain weight, something would snap. I would binge. I would stop caring. It was like something deep inside me refused to let me succeed."

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Unconscious Beliefs: The Hidden Force Shaping Our Reality
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Unconscious Beliefs: The Hidden Force Shaping Our Reality

The Consequences of These Stories

When we fail to recognize that our feelings originate from unconscious beliefs, we create more trauma in our lives. We blame our partner, leading to unnecessary arguments and breakups. We blame our career, which causes us to jump from job to job without true fulfillment. We isolate ourselves from family and friends, thinking they don’t understand us, when we are projecting our own unresolved emotions onto them.

This pattern can create attachment issues, loss of relationships, and a deep sense of isolation. All these changes can create even more trauma. Over time, we reinforce the belief that happiness is always just out of reach, leading to chronic dissatisfaction and emotional exhaustion.

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Why Your Love Story Keeps Repeating: Harvard Reveals Hidden Patterns
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Why Your Love Story Keeps Repeating: Harvard Reveals Hidden Patterns

Have you ever felt stuck in a loop of heartbreak, wondering why your relationships keep ending the same way? Do you find yourself drawn to partners who can't give you what you need, even when you promise yourself "this time will be different"?

The truth is, there might be an invisible script running in the background of your love life. Harvard researchers have uncovered fascinating evidence about how our deepest beliefs silently orchestrate our relationship choices - often without us even knowing it.

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Healing from the Inside Out: How EFT Changes Unconscious Beliefs and Chronic Pain
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Healing from the Inside Out: How EFT Changes Unconscious Beliefs and Chronic Pain

As an unconscious belief trauma coach, I have witnessed time and time again how Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) can bring about profound shifts in my clients' emotional and physical well-being. But now, groundbreaking research is validating what many EFT practitioners have intuitively known: EFT doesn’t just help people “feel better” emotionally—it actively rewires the brain and can significantly reduce chronic pain.

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Powerful Unseen Forces: Projection and the Unconscious in Psychology
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Powerful Unseen Forces: Projection and the Unconscious in Psychology

Powerful Unseen Forces: Projection and the Unconscious in Psychology

Psychology's often-overlooked satisfying aspects revolve around projection and the unconscious mind.

These mechanisms don't just influence human interaction; they shape human perception, affect relationship dynamics, and mold the mental health of those under their spell.

Grasping the basic elements of these (admittedly, not all straightforward) concepts can yield remarkable results in terms of both personal insight and improved social functioning.

What is Projection?

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Hidden Chains: How Unconscious Beliefs Can Lead to Depression and Relationship Patterns
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Hidden Chains: How Unconscious Beliefs Can Lead to Depression and Relationship Patterns

Hidden Chains: How Unconscious Beliefs Can Lead to Depression and Relationship Patterns

Struggling with depression and anxiety since childhood, I never understood why success, love, and financial stability couldn’t bring me peace. Growing up with a mentally ill single mother who worked two jobs, an abusive and absent father, and the weight of being a teenage mother, I fought my way to becoming a highly successful sales rep. I had money, my dream home, and a husband I loved—but still, I felt trapped in fear, anxiety, and self-sabotage.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but my unconscious childhood beliefs—messages like happiness isn’t safe, love always leads to pain, and I will be abandoned—were running my life. These deep-seated beliefs caused me to sabotage my own happiness, leading to two divorces from the same man and selling my dream home, all because my nervous system was wired for struggle.

Through my journey of becoming a counselor and discovering EFT Tapping (Emotional Freedom Technique), I finally understood how my mind had been creating my reality. By identifying and rewiring these limiting beliefs, I learned how to break free from the emotional loops that had kept me stuck.

If you’ve ever felt trapped in depression, anxiety, or toxic relationship cycles, it’s not your fault—your unconscious mind is simply following an old script. But the good news? You can change it.

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Why Love Feels Like a Battlefield: How Unconscious Beliefs Sabotage Your Relationships
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

Why Love Feels Like a Battlefield: How Unconscious Beliefs Sabotage Your Relationships

Are Unconscious Beliefs Sabotaging Your Love Life?

Do you keep attracting emotionally unavailable partners, only to feel heartbroken when the connection fades? Or do you push away healthy relationships without understanding why love feels so out of reach? The answer may lie in your unconscious beliefs—deeply ingrained thought patterns formed in childhood that silently shape your romantic choices.

💔 The Chemistry of Unconscious Beliefs 💔
If you subconsciously believe "I don’t deserve love", you might be drawn to emotionally distant partners who reinforce that belief. On the other hand, genuine love may feel unsettling, triggering a need to push it away. These hidden patterns create relationship chaos, leaving you feeling frustrated, confused, and stuck in repetitive cycles.

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The Hidden Puppet Master: How Childhood Emotions Steer Your Big Decisions
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

The Hidden Puppet Master: How Childhood Emotions Steer Your Big Decisions

The Hidden Puppet Master: How Childhood Emotions Steer Your Big Decisions

Have you ever made a big decision—whether in love, career, or life—only to later wonder, Why did I do that? The answer may not lie in logic or circumstance but in something much deeper: your childhood emotions.

From a young age, our experiences shape the way we perceive safety, love, success, and self-worth. Unresolved childhood emotions act as a hidden puppet master, pulling the strings behind our biggest life choices. If you grew up feeling unseen, you might chase validation in your career. If love felt unstable, you might push away or cling too tightly in relationships.

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The Power of Thoughts: Transforming Your Reality, One Crystal at a Time
Melissa Chana Melissa Chana

The Power of Thoughts: Transforming Your Reality, One Crystal at a Time

The Power of Thoughts: Transforming Your Reality, One Crystal at a Time

Your thoughts are more than just passing ideas—they are the architects of your reality. As a life coach, I’ve seen firsthand how shifting one’s mindset can lead to profound transformations. Science even supports this concept, as seen in Dr. Masaru Emoto’s research on how thoughts and emotions influence water molecules. His findings suggest that positive energy creates harmony at a molecular level, while negativity leads to distortion—an insight with powerful implications for our well-being.

💎 What Does This Mean for You? 💎
Since our bodies are largely made of water, imagine the impact our thoughts have on our health, emotions, and personal growth. Just like Emoto’s water crystals, our inner world reflects the energy we hold onto. This is where crystals come in—they act as energetic amplifiers, helping to align your thoughts with your desired reality.

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